Author: fizzgigwp

I’m so very glad to see this happen. This will make a real positive impact on the lives of intersex folks.

“ACT drafts Australian-first legislation to stop deferrable surgical interventions on intersex children”

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2022-05-31/act-drafts-australian-first-intersex-legislation/101107770?fbclid=IwAR1OtIPDnz643ACP4Zoo64GlPJo-IGHO71CLcG1SbE2nZnKtygkFIYJ4lgk&fs=e&s=cl

The more I read, the more I watch, the more I learn from intersex people the more I’m so very glad we pushed back against doing surgery on our intersex kid.

The conversations we’ve had with them so far have confirmed it’s absolutely the right decision. At some point they will want to discuss it in detail about why we made the decision we did. And I’m so glad we will be able to say we focused on their body autonomy and right to consent.

This should be the default for all kids but for intersex kids there’s almost no discussion from doctors or surgeons about that reality. They just bypass all of that and go straight to what they term corrective surgery without ever once considering that intersex kids aren’t broken.

There’s a lot of places in the world where legislation is either in place or they are trying to pass which amount to nothing more than hate and fear of LGBTQI people.

Here in Australia they’ve recently tried to pass a “religious discrimination” bill which was really a religious privilege bill which would have made it legal for religious people to say horrific things like my kid was going to burn in hell just for being who they are or them being intersex was a punishment from god. Thankfully it failed, this time.

They have another that’s supposedly about protecting women’s sport but it’s yet another anti-trans bill and would actually erase intersex people from the sex discrimination act removing what little legal protections they have. It’s abhorrent and it’s supporters completely dismiss any criticism of it because they don’t care that it would remove legal protections for intersex people.

In their minds intersex, trans, & LGBQ folks should all just go back to being hidden on the fringes of society. And they are still really pissed off that marriage equality was passed into law so bills like this are about revenge as well.

I know, I know, it’s been a while but geez didn’t covid throw us all for a loop? And still continuing to do so on a weekly basis. Through all of this we’ve been finding new and different ways to support our kid as they experience this mess while also finding out more about themselves and their intersex status. They’ve taken it in their stride and kept right on going. Along with that those have been some mental health issues which we’re getting professional help with. Hopefully that will improve things for them.

We’ve had lots of discussions about differences and inclusion and how they might fit in the world.

I think that’s it for now. Just wanted to say I’m back and I’ll be posting again.

A new page has popped up on Facebook and Twitter, Intersex Action. Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/IntersexAction/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/intersexaction?s=21

I like the idea of a weekly action item to create support and community for intersex folks. Here’s a list of questions the page founder has answered.

Been seeing a some of the same questions come up, and I understand that the way I’ve presented Intersex Action so far is a little ambiguous. So here’s my attempt to clear some stuff up.

Not a lot of content yet is there?

Not yet. Intersex Action went from an idea in a conversation to a Facebook page in under an hour. So there really hasn’t been any opportunity to establish anything yet. Which makes the overwhelming support this has got in the last 24 hours absolutely incredible!

So what’s the plan?

Every Monday at 12pm AEST I will post an “Action”. An Action is intended to be a ten minute commitment that you have the entire week to complete. I’m trying to keep my mind open to what actions might be, but the general idea is to have a positive impact on the intersex rights movement. It might involve improving your knowledge as an ally, sharing information with your community, supporting intersex-led organisations, or direct action when it is needed.

And what’s the goal?

An end to unconsented and coerced medical intervention, preferably through legislative protections. While there are plenty of other goals the movement has, this has been a key priority since the very start of the movement. A more detailed list of advocacy goals can be found at darlington.org.au/statement/. But that’s getting ahead of ourselves for now, there’ll be plenty of actions around it.

Do I have to do everything?

You don’t have to do anything. But the assumption is that you followed a page called Intersex Action because you feel like you have something to contribute. Part of the reason this page exists is that it’s very difficult to bring allies on board when the activism and knowledge exists at a fairly high level. So the idea is while advocates do the heavy lifting, you’re doing something small to support us.

Part of this capacity building is learning more about intersex in an incremental capacity. So if all you have a chance to do is keep up with the learning actions. That’s plenty. 🙂

Who are you?

I’m Cody Smith. A well established intersex advocate based in Australia on Ngunnawal / Ngambri country. I work as an Intersex Project Worker for A Gender Agenda, and volunteer with Intersex Peer Support Australia as ACT Regional Liaision and Secretary. I have also been a part of the Darlington Consortium since the first retreat, proud to have contributed to Youth & I, and spoken at conferences like Health In Difference and Better Together. I was born with intersex variation and have experiences of unconsented medical intervention. So a lot of this work is very close to my heart.

I should also take time to note that this project is my own and is not endorsed or affiliated with any of the above listed organisations. I’ll be sure to disclose any connections with these organisations if an Action supports them.

So this is an Australian page?

To start off with sure. It’s best I stick to what I know, and I like to think I understand what best practice looks like in Australia and how it’s supported here. But one of the most incredible things I’ve got to experience is interacting with the global intersex movement. If this page reaches a certain size, I’d love to bring more advocates into the mix to talk about the global movement.

One action a week doesn’t seem like a lot?

It’s not supposed to be. My vision for this at the moment is a thousand people who are willing to do one small thing a week, with the collective action making it big when it counts. I also want to limit my own commitment to this project to ensure that it remains sustainable.

That said, I have some ideas to expand the scope of the project if there is an opportunity to. Perhaps one larger action a month. A community content slot during the week. A spotlight for advocates and community members. Opportunities for streams and conversations. There will also probably be times where we need to respond to something more immediately, so once in a blue moon I anticipate emergency actions as well.

But for now I’ll see you once a week every Monday.

So this is about having a personal army?

I promise I will never use this project to dogpile or attack anyone. I want this space to be built on a foundation of kindness and support. I want to welcome people into the fold and have them feel safe to stumble or ask awkward questions. When I call for an Action I want it to amplify the work that’s already being done. If I fail to live up to this, call me out.

I want to contribute to the Intersex Action project!

Please do! You can share the page, try and get other people on board with Actions, report back to this community with your successes and challenges. I’m not really looking for people to help me run the page right now. But if that ever changes, you’ll know.

No, what I mean is I’m intersex and it’d be great if you could boost my work!

Fantastic! Drop me an email at intersexaction@mangojester.com and if it’s in the scope of the project. I’m happy to see what I can do.

In a recent discussion I responded to someone with this.

“I wish there had been an advocate there to say to us things like:
“Your kid isn’t broken”
“There is no medical requirement for surgery.”
“You have a long time to think over what’s best for your kid.”
“Your kid should have their own say”

And the more I think about it the more it’s something that HAS to happen. When an intersex kid is born the very last thing they need is a surgical opinion. Especially presented as if it’s the only option. Of course there will be some kids for whom a surgery is a medical necessity and cannot be put off because it puts their health in danger. But that’s a very small minority of kids.

The vast majority of intersex kids don’t need surgery and presenting that as the only option is disingenuous at best. When an intersex kid is born the medical team should be calling a qualified secular counsellor, preferably an intersex person themselves. Someone who can advocate for the kid and their future, free from medically unnecessary, destructive, irreversible, surgical interference.

I had some follow up about the last post. They’ve sent me a draft of what their writing. And it was beautiful. It included stories from other parents of intersex kids and from intersex people themselves. I can’t say much more until the report goes public but it gives me great hope for the future as the pressure mounts to prevent or ban surgeries on intersex kids.

I recently had the opportunity to speak to someone directly about our experiences when my kid was born. It was an amazing feeling to be able to open up to someone who understood already so much of what I was talking about. So I may have talked a fair bit…ok I talked a LOT but it was worth it.

And it highlighted to me that what parents of intersex kids need is a space away from the people pressuring them to do a surgery on their kid. They need support to know that surgery is far from the best option. They need to know there’s time to wait. They need to know that doing a cosmetic surgery on their child without that child’s consent isn’t ok.

That’s how we protect intersex kids. By supporting the parents to make the better choice.

What the hell are we doing? What the hell are we supposed to be doing? We’re all in hiding while trying to pretend to our kids that life if mostly “normal”.

At times I find myself terrified of the possibility of having to take my kid to a doctor. I’m doing everything I can to keep them healthy so we don’t have to use up any medical person’s time that needs to be spent on someone who really needs it.

Meanwhile the physical distance restrictions began just after we were starting to connect with the local support group for LGBTQIA kids and their parents. My kid was just starting to get comfortable around these folks and now we’ll have to do that all over again when this eventually passes.

This was going to be the year we really started to talk to our kid about what intersex means and what it could mean for him in the future. It’s a small worry compared to those that are losing loved ones but given he’s now had school completely disrupted and is already freaked out by the Coronavirus I just don’t think now is the time to be putting anymore stress his way.

Sorry, this wasn’t meant to be a rant for my first post back after too many months away but this is where we are, this is how I’m feeling. What the hell are we doing?

This is amazing. Please watch it. https://youtu.be/vHehhOgSEcg